she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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