I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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