living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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