Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Randomize
