If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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