Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
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