This girl is more easily done than said...
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
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