he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
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