Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
