i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
