oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
