how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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