It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I can text with my tongue
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
