I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
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