That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
