Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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