If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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