Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize