So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
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