She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize
