idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
