Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
