You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize