He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Thank you for not boning my boss.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
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