Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Randomize
