whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
