I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
