So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
