Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
