in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
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