What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
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