Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
