how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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