i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
