no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
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