Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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