It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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