But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
