you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize