If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
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