Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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