from now on my penis is your penis
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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