Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
