I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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