I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Semen is not good for contacts.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize
