1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Randomize