Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
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