TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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