go do what you do best...puke behind churches
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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