dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
where does the pee come out of this thing
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
