What did we do last night that was yellow?
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
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